Building a Future

As of March 29th I am no longer employed at Andrus. I was looking at my options and fired because someone ratted me out at the place I called looking for employment that would allow me to attend school and do my photography business.
This has been a major blessing to me in the last 5 days I've spent my time studying the teachings of the Lord and Drawing closer to him. I am learning more about the path he has chosen for me. I have spent some time on a web page. I have also spent some time looking into stock photography.

This Weekend is General Conference for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. (LDS.ORG) It is a time that we get to listen to the voice of the God through his prophets on the earth. Much good has been said, but I am sitting here thinking about to talks. Talks about marriage.
Since early Thursday morning I've had the impression that I needed to not wait for what I wanted but to move forward in faith that what God was preparing for me would be available to me if I entered beyond the known and into the unknown.
Then came the talk by President Monson that made me feel like I needed to move forward even if the girl I wanted to walk with me wasn't ready to move in that direction. That employment and education should not be what keeps me from marriage, that it was time to take seriously this path and begin immediately towards it and since I'd been feeling that way anyways it felt like I was being lectured... "Oh, Ye of Little Faith, why haven't you yet begun what you know to be the right action?" On my second listen through this didn't come across so poignantly, but then I'd already decided what I should do and taken some actions in that direction.

Heather is my best friend and still I snapped at her today. I have felt that things where getting more difficult between Heather and I, most I will admit is my fault I feel very much alone and not understood in this world at times.. and so it has been this last week even though there has been a major out pouring of love in my regard.  I felt terrible after snapping at her, I try so hard to be better than my normal tenancies toward instant response, to slow my thoughts and think about my responses before I make them. I am not even sure why I snapped, I suppose it comes from a little of the above. . . we were talking about the First of the two talks when I did so.

I have spent the last few few days assembling a work area with what I have available. I made my desk area more user friendly by removing the selves that restricted my legs.. I've put additional storage space to replace it to my left, using a shelf I had laying around and some cardboard boxes. I have elevated my laptop eight inches and believe I'll be raising it again so i am not always looking down at my screen, and I'm using my USB keyboard to make typing more comfortable.
While in this remodel my chair broke, again, this time I haven't been able to fix it. I have had to order another, but have continued to try to make repairs to my chair. My final attempt is being made as I type this, currently setting on my cooler so that I have something to set me reasonably comfortably at my desk. In this attempt I have elected to JBWeld the chair to its post. Which will make it so it can not rotate but should give me the required strength to be able to cancel my chair order for a while saving myself a week worth of food money.

In the next week I've got plans to meet with school councilor at SUU, then also my intention is to make an attempt at Art Institute. I've got plans to write my books, and as soon as I have a chair that allows me to sit for more than a couple hours at a time without a 30 minute break I'll begin that process.

I am very excited at what the future holds, while it scares me some of the things that it appears I've been ask to do but I am also very glad that I've been able to have the last couple days to really get my head on strait and determine what it is I'd like to do.

Adieu